This article follows the one entitled « Man is mishandled, not so much by the difficulties as by the idea he has of them » and which ends with “A nice Indian tale”.
The idea that we have of the events that happen to us, of the situations that we live (which become “our beliefs”) can totally change our life.
I remember reading about a large-scale scientific study that was done on identical twins.
A man, an alcoholic, drug addict and delinquent, spent a large part of his life in prison. After each crime he was arrested, detained for a few months or years. But as soon as he got out, he would start his robbery again and leave for another stay in a prison. He reproduced this pattern for most of his life.
During one of his outings, he lived for a few months with a woman whom he got pregnant. She gave birth to twins, two boys.
Investigators found these twins years later...
Investigators in this study found these twins years later, when they were adults.
They had been separated quite young and had lost touch with each other.
One of them had followed the same scenario as his father: he was an alcoholic, drug addict, delinquent and, like his father, regularly spent time in prison.
The investigator was able to get permission and went to visit him. After some discussion with him, he asked him this question:
- « But how did you get to this point? »
And he answered:
- « But ... with the father I had, do you think I really had a choice? »
As for the other twin, the investigator found him as well. He lived in a luxurious mansion with a swimming pool, he was the CEO of several companies, he was married, he had two children, he had succeeded perfectly in his emotional, family and professional life ...
And when the interviewer asked him the same question:
- « But how did you get there? »
He replied:
- « But ... with the father I had, do you think I really had a choice? »
In this story of twins, it is the “belief” of each one that determined such a difference in their lives.
I cannot resist quoting again this sentence that I particularly appreciate and that has helped me a lot in life:
« It is not events that affect men,
but the interpretation that men have of these events »
Epictète